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Men are generally pretty bad at making friends—at least with other guys.Especially as we get older, men often have fewer close male friendships.Yet, according to research, we crave intimacy in our friendships just as much as women.Worst of all, this lack of close relationships could be very, very bad for us.The end of high school and college seem to be the prime time for men to make friends with other guys.This is when we start to zero in on our interests and begin finding paths for our adult lives.
The key is acknowledging your nerves and then calmly stepping past them.
So enjoy the quality not so much the quantity.”Increasing time-demands from our jobs, from our spouses, and from our children make it more challenging. And where we once may have explored other interests and made new connections, it becomes harder and harder to fight that inertia and broaden our social circles.
This narrowing of our social circles isn’t all bad.
This translates into having less interest or tolerance for making friends with men who don’t share the same ideals.
But many other men feel a loss of connection as they get older—and the sense that having more close male friendships would be valuable. Some of the common themes that emerge are: One big barrier for these men seems to be the lack of practice with “chatting up” a guy.
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Many guys are happy to maintain a few strong connections with men they’ve met in high school or college—and they don’t feel the need for much more socialization beyond that and their family.